October 2010
September 2010
Alejandro (Lady Gaga cover)
Johanna's High
Johanna’s High-Alejandro.
Oh, God, that accent is so cute. “Don’t wanna keys, don’t wanna touch.”
Dear really adorable alterna-queer couple who overheard my super sad showdown with my dad tonight,
Thanks so much for passing me a note that read “Don’t let anyone tell you it’s wrong to be gay. Anyone.” It was really sweet and made me tear up a little. Too bad that wasn’t what we were discussing/arguing over. If you, however, magically see this and want to invite me into your bed, I wouldn’t say no. (Mostly ‘cause I need a bed, but, also because you’re cute.)
Play
Who wants to be my date to Deerhunter on Friday?
Do they make chest hair plugs?
My water-to-apple-cinnamon-oatmeal ratio is all wrong.
a bro by any other name is just as emotionally defunct
Just applied for a job with the Human Rights Campaign
You know, so EVERYONE will know I’m a faggot.
Could I get a job rating the comfort level of sofas, when slept on? Being homeless has made me really good at that. Pro tip: broken-in leather cushions are the most comfortable.
Dear bosses,
if it makes you uncomfortable to have me run the espresso machine due to my stability “issues,” why did you hire me? You’ve known me since I was 12, you’ve certainly become aware of my abilities in the decade we’ve been acquaintances.
I was curious as to why, after 4 months, I still wasn’t fully trained on that machine.
Thanks,
Alastair.
SINGLE BLACK FEMALE, ADDICTED TO RETAIL.
Brenda Strong vs. Brenda Song.
Oh, hey, Dad, thanks for calling three weeks after you kick me out to tell me how concerned you are and then telling me I'm manipulating the situation when I get upset and mention that most parents don't force their children into homelessness.
Fuck you for vilifying me when you sat there and said nothing while mom uttered the words “you’re not welcome here.” Fuck you fuck you fuck you.
