These are all things I’ve said before but this is a process and I’m still working through it.


Reminders that my body is broken:

 

  1. I avoid mirrors, convenience store security screens, and shop windows whenever possible because I am ashamed of the way my body moves.
  2. My back always hurts.
  3. When I was thirteen, I wanted to have both my legs amputated because “they [didn’t] work anyway.”
  4. Small children always ask their parents why I walk “that way.”
  5. Grown men harass me on the street calling me things like “lucky,” “cripple,” and “retard” because I am the butt of a joke.
  6. In ninth grade I tried to kill myself.
  7. Saint Patrick’s Day is my favorite holiday because no one looks twice at me.
  8. Saint Patrick’s Day is my least favorite holiday because everyone assumes I’m just drunk.
  9. I am afraid to disclose my disability on my OKCupid profile for fear that I will be seen as less than an ideal mate.

10. I have had someone end a date when they realized I walk with a limp.

11. I do not think I am attractive.

12. My disability is both the most frightening and most comforting thing I can think of.

13. I never learned to dance. My body doesn’t move that way.

14. I fall at least once a day.

15. When I am in public, my body, and the way it moves through the world is up for discussion from everyone but me.

16. I overcompensate for my obvious physical shortcomings by being overly aggressive to prove that I am just as able to do things as everyone else.

17. My handwriting looks like garbage.

18. But mostly, my back just always hurts, and that’s reminder enough.


Never forget R. Kelly’s yodeling era. Or that green screen.




Currently reading.

Currently reading.


rrrrrrrrrright:

whenever i find a condom wrapper in my room…..

hell yeah girl, you did dat


bunscout:

I just want a sugar daddy but instead of it being a rich older man, I want it to be Gillian Anderson

(via teacakes)